The Liebster Award

The Liebster Award.


I’m rubbish at these things – I don’t really know how to internet (someone else set up my blog for me, Jesus, I don’t even understand hashtags). So I don’t get involved in things that I want to contribute to (no Sinful Sunday posts despite loving that work, no Elust submissions either, for the same reasons, I am bamboozled by the instructions and I’m afraid of breaking things. And don’t get me started on fecking Dropbox or Evernote FECK OFF, I JUST CAN’T FIGURE IT OUT)

So if I do this wrong or somehow fall short, here’s my apology up front. I’m sorry, I tried.

I was nominated by HornyGeekGirl . I don’t know her very well, we have chats and I have a deep-seated belief that she is probably a fantastic host and is certainly someone I’d love to have a bottle (or 4) of Prosecco with. She has also been a lot braver than me and although she doesn’t know it, has made me think about revealing something.

I just know I like her so I’ll happily answer her questions, even if I don’t know 5 other bloggers who will answer. Is this like the ice bucket challenge where you might get nominated a load of times? I don’t know.




The award comes with rules, so if you are nominated, you are required to do the following:


  1. Thank the person who nominated you and link to their blog.
  2. Answer the questions provided by the person who nominated you.
  3. Provide eleven random facts about yourself.
  4. Nominate 5-11 blogs that you feel deserve the award and have less than one thousand followers.
  5. Create a new list of questions for the bloggers to answer.


Here are my answers to Horny Geek Girl’s questions:


What’s your idea of a perfect Sunday morning?

Wake up to someone I like, have sex, turn around and go back to sleep. Then wake again to find they’d slipped out to get the papers and breakfast. And then lay in bed, reading papers and havng more sex for most of the day. Bliss. Sleep in, sex, bacon and the papers – what more do you want?

If your house was burning down and you could save one item, what would it be? (Question assumes family and pets are safe).

I used to say my cameras but really, it would be my laptop. I don’t know how to back up anything, so I don’t. I don’t understand ‘the cloud’ so all my writing (except for what’s on the blog) and all my photos would be gone. And given I’m such a camera nazi, a lot of other people’s memories would be gone too.

Is the glass half-empty or half-full?

Right now, it’s half full. But for a lot of my life, without much having to change, I tend to view it as half empty.

If you could have a threesome with any two celebrities who would you choose?

Jesus? Threesomes are so much work. And as much as a dickhead as this is going to make me sound, I don’t really fancy or fantasise about famous people. I only really fancy people I know or have spoken to? But if I had to – Ok Penelope Cruz and Michael Sheen if we’re doing MFF. – God I love his Welsh accent. And Jon Snow doesn’t make the list because he’s too young and a fictional character but if he did, him and Eric Northman (Alexander Skarsgard) would make up the MMF threesome. But I feel the wrong kind of dirty just typing that.

Which is your favourite season and why?

Spring! I was born in spring and I love the newness of it, things are getting brighter, we’re leaving winter behind. I feel people are at their best in their own season. I usually am. Plus I can wear high boots and short skirts, generally wear a bit less without the pressure of summer where it’s all revealed.

Do you have a favourite book (one you read over and over)? What is it and why?

Yup! Irvine Welsh’s Trainspotting, all day long, every day. It’s a spectacular piece of work. AND a great coffee table/bathroom book. You can pick it up, at nearly any chapter and that chapter will stand alone, you’ll have a little story there that you maybe won’t need to have read the rest of it to get something from. And it’s funny and horrible, and shocking and human. I could gush all day about it.

If you could be any character from literature who would you be and why?

Arya Stark. The girl is straight up bad ass and fucking amazing. I have laughed at people calling their daughters Khaleesi (swear to god I know someone who did that to their child) while simultaneously harbouring notions that if I ever had a girl I would call her Arya. (fully appreciate that Game of Thrones isn’t exactly literature)

Coffee or tea (or something else)?

Well if the Prosecco is going, I’ll take that but mostly? I’ll take the tea please, just black, no sugar. And preferably English Breakfast or Barry’s.

What are you wearing right now? (Yeah I know I’m a perv).

Pink bra & French knickers, black tights, short wine coloured skater skirt, white vest and blue denim shirt tied in a knot. And leopard print ballet pumps

If you could move to any country, where would you go and why?

Probably the UK. I’ve lived there before, I like the people. We share a sense of humour and our venn diagrams of culture have huge crossover. Plus it would be easy and I’m done with hard. I’ve lived in America and Australia. I liked the UK the best. I get away with being me there. No one liked me in Australia and no one understood me in the US! (and I don’t mean my accent, I mean my sense of humour)

What superpower would you love to have?

To be able to understand and speak any language as and when I heard them. Without ever having to do any of the work to remember them. That or photographic memory. That would be useful, if a little traumatic.



Random Facts About Myself

  1. I am an actual disgrace of a human being if you let me get too hungry
  2. I don’t have a preferred side of the bad, you can have what side you like
  3. I won’t eat lamb. I just don’t like the taste, I would cry if that was served at a dinner party (see RF no.1)
  4. I adore good bed linen – high quality and laundered well
  5. Unfortunately I will judge you on your table manners, stupid comment my mom made as a kid about knowing the measure of someone. I will actually wince if you put your knife in your mouth in front of me. And I will be visibly uncomfortable it you don’t put your knife & fork together when you’re done. Ditto on your handshake, comment my dad made to me as a kid, again knowing the measure of someone
  6. I am not at all jealous. I covet others skills or shiny hair sure, but I’m not a possessive lover. I don’t care about your ex, or if you have lunch with a hot colleague. I trust you.
  7. Lurchers are my favourite dog and I hope to own one one day, a blonde one
  8. I have not come to terms with my own height – I am 5’8” and I feel too tall a lot of the time. I’m working on it.
  9. My biggest insecurity is about my intelligence. I doubt its existence on a daily basis
  10. I really hate weddings. And absolutely abhor hen nights. I can’t understand why so many people still ask me to go on them? (disclaimer: if your hen night involves no paraphernalia and you paying for dinner in a swanky restaurant in Dublin – then I reserve the right to review my harsh but fair stance on the matter)
  11. Butter is my heroin. I think I am made up of 80% Kerrygold (obvs the best butter in the world)


Nominations (in no particular order)

Ruby Bell

Diverse Male

Vida Bailey

Maria Sibylla


If you’ve already been nomindated then sincere apologies guys  – carry on with your day…. don’t mind me.



If any of my nominees do want to play along here are my questions for you to answer:

  1. Bacon or sausages? You can only have one…
  2. When a plane lands is it ever acceptable to clap?
  3. What do you crave when you’re hungover?
  4. What is the sexiest accent for you?
  5. Where have you been, that would surprise me that you have no interest in returning to? And why? (i.e. somewhere that’s universally thought of as great)
  6. If I made you a cup of tea/cup of coffee/sandwich and it wasn’t to your liking, would you tell me?
  7. If someone had some food on their face, something in their teeth, would you tell them?
  8. Do you have any strong feelings about your name, first or surname – or if you’re a girl, giving it up?
  9. Do you leave voicemails, or just hang up and send a text?
  10. What is an unacceptable item of clothing that would have you struggling to forgive?
  11. If you left your country for a year what would be the thing that you would miss the most (we’re assuming you’d miss your family, partner, friends and pets)


Thanks Horny Geek Girl – I am well and truly out of my comfortzone – but eventually in a good way.

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